God Bless the Senate Republicans
by
Mike Ferner
Into every tragically depressing world situation some light must shine if you wait long enough and the planets align just right.
That glimmer of light came yesterday from, of all places, the Death Star known by many as Washington, D.C., from deep within one of the most unfathomable quadrants of that bleakness – the chambers of the United States Senate. Even more remarkably, it sprang from what some consider a true black hole – the Republican caucus.
But light it is, and in these times we need to celebrate every photon that comes our way.
Yesterday, the Senate voted 53-45, seven votes short
of the 60 needed to advance the bill, against a $50,000,000,000
“supplemental” funding measure passed earlier this week by the
Democratic-controlled House of Representatives. What the Republicans
objected to was the limp, inconsequential troop withdrawal plan
supported by House and Senate Democrats – something that Groucho Marx
would have much more accurately termed, “
a sham of a mockery of a
sham.”
The sham-of-a-mockery-of-a-withdrawal the
Democrats wrote and the Republicans just could not stomach, required
the president to pull U.S. troops out of Iraq by December 15, 2008 –
all except a few thousand for "protecting United States diplomatic
facilities;" perhaps ten thousand or so for "conducting limited
training, equipping, and providing logistical and intelligence support
to the Iraqi security forces," a few more thousand for "protecting
United States Armed Forces and American citizens" in Iraq, including
those pillars of the community from Blackwater, Inc.; and a few more
thousand for "engaging in targeted counterterrorism operations against
al-Qaeda, al-Qaeda affiliated groups, and other terrorist organizations
in Iraq."
This
was the “withdrawal” plan the Democrats wanted in exchange for another
50 billion dollars to continue the war. To paraphrase the late
Republican Senator Everett Dirksen: “Even though the dollar is rapidly
going down the toilet, pretty soon it adds up to real money.”
To the Senate Republicans I send a warm “thank you” for killing a $50,000,000,000 cash infusion into this tragic, illegal war.
To
the scores of peace activists around the country preparing to
occupy
their U.S. Senators’ local offices to press them to vote against more
war funding I say, “Declare victory in this round. And then get 10
friends to pledge to occupy those offices with you in February, when
the Democrats will feel compelled to bail out Bush again.”
To
MoveOn.org and similar groups whose main purpose in life is toadying up
to the Democratic Party, I say, “Spare us your electronic mobilizations
of well-meaning citizens to bombard the airwaves and street corners
with a ‘Damn the Republicans for voting against a timetable to end the
war’ message. Leave the internet lines open for more meaningful emails
like Nigerian business opportunities and penis patches.”
And
to anyone who thinks this too cynical or too hard on our last, best
hope, the Congressional Democrats, I commend this pompous, arrogant,
condescending quote, dripping with hubris from a leading Senate
liberal, Carl Levin (D-MI),
during yesterday’s Senate debate: “We need
to do more than say to the Iraqis that our patience has run out and
that they need to seize the opportunity that has been given them…Their
dawdling will only end when they have no choice.”
Yes, it’s quite an opportunity we’ve given the Iraqis, Senator Levin…but then they are such an ungrateful, dawdling lot.
Mike Ferner is a freelance writer from Ohio and author of “
Inside the Red Zone: A Veteran For Peace Reports from Iraq.”
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